


Runaway

by Valkyria99



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-23
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-01-22 01:03:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12470016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valkyria99/pseuds/Valkyria99
Summary: Nathaniel is ten when he is abandoned with his six-year-old sister Nathalie. Nathan drinks a lot. It was bad enough before but now that Mary is gone he is more horrible than Nathaniel ever could imagine. But Nathaniel is alright, he can do it. He’ll protect his little sister and survive.





	1. Chapter 1

It was almost midnight and Nathaniel was anxious, he was laying in his bed. The ticking of the clock kept reminding him of the inescapable. His sister  was nestled next to him, she had already fallen asleep. Long strands of auburn hair were covering her face while she breathed  softly . 

He wished she was awake, so he could talk to her or play with her. He would  happily play top model with her dolls, even make the sounds  just so he wouldn’t be all alone. Waiting. 

Sometimes Nathaniel felt jealous. Jealous of his tiny sister who deserved everything good that there was in the world. Jealous because Nathaniel wanted to be as clueless as her. He wanted to be as carefree as her. Sleep almost every night undisturbed, untouched. 

But he was the big one, and his dad was who he was, and it wasn’t like Nathalie had it easy, she is afraid all the time. It was not the perfect environment for a child to grow up in, with all the screaming and hiding. Nathaniel wanted her to have a chance when she grew up, to become something and to escape. He wanted that for himself too, but sometimes he doubted. 

Running away is always an option but staying safe would be hard. His eleven and he wants to be big enough but his not. Even if he could run away, he'd always  be hunted by Nathan. In memories, in dreams and in the scars covering his body. 

Nathalie turned in her sleep and kicked his leg, unaware of the outside world and all the darkness in it. 

The clock kept on ticking and Nathaniel stared up onto the ceiling where he had glued glowing stars on. Lately, he’d been developing a kind of fear for the dark. It was embarrassing because he was almost 11 and he couldn’t sleep if it was dark, he hadn’t had this problem before. It was stupid, another thing his dad could hurt him for. But every time he turned the lights it always ended in panic. Last night he'd gotten as far as his bed before he'd jumped out and fallen over a chair to turn the light on. He’d started sneaking into Nathalie’s bed and light her night lamp before he could finally close his eyes and rest. She didn’t say anything, thank god. If she did he would have been so embarrassed, he was not a baby. She was and his job was to take care of her not the other way around. 

Time went by slow in the night, the silence only disrupted by the ticking of the clock, echoing in the big bedroom. They had a big house, a very big one. Too big for two kids and one dad, or one man. Nathaniel was never going to think of him as his dad again, that made it gross. 

After 1am Nathaniel started to relax, Nathalie was now nestled in real close and he felt ok, he felt calm. Nathan was going to be away for the night if he didn’t make it by 1 am he wouldn't make it. That was the motto of their house. 

Nathaniel closed his eyes for a moment and he fell asleep.  That quick thoughtless sleep that never lasts for more than a couple of hours because he never meant to fall asleep . Big mistake because it’s always worse to be wakened by a drunk Nathan than to be awake and prepared. 

He fell right onto the bed tousling everything up and Nathalie screamed. Because she didn’t know better and that was a good thing. That meant she was safe but it only made Nathan angrier. He is already angry. 

When Nathaniel tried to get up from bed to push Nathalie away. He hit him, hard and Nathaniel fell back onto the bed. Blank spots dancing in front of his eyes. In this haste, he’d be unconscious in an hour or so. Small mercy. 

Nathan screamed at Nathalie to get out. He kept screaming and pushing her off the bed. But she wouldn't go, holding Nathaniel's hand. Nathaniel had to intervene.

”Ladybug, please go to your room.” His voice sounded strange even to his own ears but she listened. She got out of bed with her tiny rabbit and looked up at him with her big eyes and she was sobbing now.

All he wanted was to hug her and cry himself but he couldn’t. He would grit his teeth and make it through because he always did. ”I love you ladybug.” He said when she had reached the door and when she closed it the whole room went dark and Nathaniel closed his eyes. 


	2. A day in the park

”I’m bored,” Natalie said crossing her arms and staring at him from beneath her eyelashes. Nathaniel put away the sketchbook he had been drawing in.

”Put the tv on.” He said, no one but them was in the house so it didn’t matter if she watched her silly cartoons. She shook her head. Nathalie a girl who always wanted to watch tv had decided that she wanted to go out. On the only day that Nathaniel felt like creeping back under the covers and never getting up again.

"Elaine bought some cookies, we could eat them while we watch tv,” Nathaniel said trying to coax her into staying.

”No, Nati. I want to play, outside.” She walked away after saying it as if decided. 

So he rolled out of bed and changed his clothes. The weather outside was not something to sing about, it was cold and it might rain but it didn’t matter. Nathalie was glad again and she babbled about her friend Ian at school and how nice he was to her.

”Aren’t you too young for someone to have a crush on you?” Nathaniel asked and she answered with a frown. ”You can never be too young for love.” Disney had already made its impression and Nathaniel smiled. 

She didn’t say anything after and they walked to the park in silence. Before they reached the swings she stopped and looked up at him. She had been dragging her bunny behind her. 

”Don’t you have someone that draws pretty pictures for you?” She asked in full seriousness. 

”No, I don’t need that.” Nathalie shook her head and looked down. 

”Everybody should have someone.” She said and it left something in its wake. Something that buried deep in Nathaniel's heart and made him feel worse than before. 

”Ladybug, I’m not like everybody else.” He said smiling at her. She looked at him. Not looking any more convinced by his words than he was of them. 

”OK” She shouted at last after minutes of consideration, her dark mood replaced. She skipped away and he followed. When they arrived at the park she ran to the big climbing frame and Nathaniel walked over to a bench nearby. He sat beneath the big apple tree. It wasn't sunny but it was warm. 

Nathalie was running past all the kids that looked like they had it all at home. A mom and a dad.  Food that wasn’t microwaved by Nathaniel because he couldn’t get up out of bed early enough to make the food in her lunch box . She made a pirouette on the playground. Her bright blue dress swirling around her and Nathaniel  was hit with a horrible feeling. 

He felt such sadness watching his little sister playing by herself. Alone in her own world not understanding how bad it was. How wrong their life was. Nathaniel was so tired of pretending like everything was alright. A sob was trying to wrench itself out from his throat and he felt his eyes fill with tears. He wiped  furiously at them. All around him kids were chattering and screaming. Moms were around the playground. They were smiling and chatting with other women like them. They laughed and clapped when their kids did something new. Listening to them  carefully when they brought something from the playground. Something the kids were proud of and showed to their moony-eyed moms. Nathaniel washout with the unfairness of it all. There he sat alone under an apple tree. His whole body sore and his heart torn in pieces trying to do his best to make his sister happy. He wiped away a stray tear and thought about how he wanted to be one of the kids in the warm embrace of their mom. Or rather how he wanted to go to bed and not wake up before his own mom returned.


End file.
